Do you feel guilty when you eat a cream cake or a chocolate bar? I feel guilty writing this with a pen and paper. I’m told it’s easy to put these thoughts straight onto a floppy disk or pen drive (whatever they are). It is not easy. Your screen may tell you it is printing out your thoughts, but it isn’t. Your printer stands there, hostile and mute, even though it has its little green light on. When you phone an expert, your thirteen year-old great niece, and they ask you to go right, then left, it takes a while to realise they mean on the mouse and not going wildly from one side of the screen to the other…but still nothing happens.
I feel guilty when I can’t turn the damn thing off! It tells you it is “closing down”, it plays you a little “goodbye” tune, but it won’t go! You wait and wait for the little green light to turn to orange and all the time it is humming away, putting up your electric bill. Why is it we are told over and over not to leave our television standby light on, in fact any standby lights, but no-one ever mentions computers?
Finally the greatest guilt of all. I turn off the power! While the green light is still on! I have had the last word. Now, where’s that cream cake?
By Freda Wallwork